Thank crochet it’s Friday

Yesterday I felt miserable. In fact all week has been hard. My older kids have had half term holidays and of course that’s when a bad bout of pain decided to strike. They have wanted some entertaining but also chill time. A friend took them one day, they played with the youngest another but for some of the time I had to get myself moving and that wasn’t easy. Sometimes it’s just willpower. Sometimes it’s willpower combined with painkillers. I saw a quote yesterday from someone on a chronic illness page that summed it up: “You don’t know how strong you are until you need to be.” That feels so true. My husband has recently been promoted which is absolutely awesome and 100% deserved. This means he has more responsibility and some days has long hours. He tries to come home at a reasonable time but it’s not always possible. Heavy is the head that wears the crown, eh? Due to this I’ve tried to be even stronger than usual. I want him to have the head-space he needs for his new job. I want him to be able to concentrate. So I’ve turned to friends and family for support. I’ve discovered that being honest with people about my illness means they will understand. It’s great. It’s reassuring. It’s not weakness to ask for help, that has taken a while to learn. Even if the help comes in the form of reassuring text messages that helps. I managed to get out the last three days but am now knackered and yesterday evening I cried, a lot. I hit rock bottom. I was overtired and I was over being in constant pain. So I turned to my most trustworthy ally, the one who waits for me every day, the one who doesn’t mind if no attention is paid for a few days and then is needed - crochet.

Immediately I felt the stress melt away. I’ve spoken many times about the scientific proof that crafts like crochet are good for you. It’s so true. Today I cheered myself up even more. It’s raining here today and raining oh so much. Despite umbrellas, raincoats and wellies we all got soaked taking the smallest person to preschool. So the big ones and I hid in a coffee shop waiting for a bus. I love that they are old enough to entertain themselves at times now. We chilled, drank hot chocolate/coffee and chatted. It was lovely and just what I needed. When we got home and dry I finished what is possibly my favourite pumpkin of all time. It’s purple and it’s huge! I love it.

My favourite bit is the crochet hook in the top. I never use this one and think I got it free with a magazine so in popped the 12mm wooden hook and it was finished. It made me giggle and smile and generally forget everything that I haven’t been able to do.

I love making and crafting. I love upcycling but I’m having to admit defeat when it comes to organising my sewing materials. It need a full day to do it and at best I have four hours and sometimes only energy for one of those. It’s beaten me so many times when I’ve tried to conquer it that I’m on the verge of giving up. I’ve been looking on Pinterest for all the exciting ways to use old material as I hate waste but I need energy for sewing. Crochet comes naturally, for sewing I have to think. So these little pumpkins and starting on some Christmas projects have helped keep me stay sane whilst aiding in rest days. It reassures me that I’m not useless because I just can’t get around to organising that sewing desk. The beauty of little projects is seeing instant results (I’m sure I’ve said that before) and it’s so true. The sense of achievement when finishing a project is wonderful and it lifts the spirit a bit every time. So when you finish a giant purple pumpkin, especially if purple is your favourite colour and you love Halloween and all things autumnal, it makes you smile. Using the crochet hook made me giggle a lot.

The kids then enjoyed playing around with things at lunch time. That was quite fun. They immediately turned the lights off and closed the candles. It’s not as spooky in daylight but still fun. 

Well I’m off to do some more crochet before I have to venture out in the rain again. Oh and before I have to crawl into the cupboard to find the Halloween decorations. Hopefully I’ll come out by Halloween. 

Take care on these spoooooooky nights.